Showing posts with label Body Image. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Body Image. Show all posts

Sunday, September 27, 2009

About Me

Today is my twenty second birthday and I am currently on vacation at the beach. In honor of my birthday I am breaking some of my original statements about being anonymous.

My name is Alexander. In real life I go by Alex, but I can't stand to see "Alex" in print. I always sign my full name and it was just a coincidence that I started using "Xander" online. I'm quite use to it now and like it a lot better.

I am a white male, I'm about fifty pounds overweight, actively dieting, and 5'11". I'm a "picky" eater, but what I do like, I like the most expensive, gourmet brand possible. For the most part I live on turkey sandwiches (yes, there is an expensive gourmet brand of deli turkey).

I am a moderate conservative. I completely disagree with the Democrats agenda, and I won't associate with the "Grand Old Party", they are not "Grand" nor are they the "Old Party".

I have a slight New York accent, even though I only visited a couple times. I went to school in southwestern Virginia and became disgusted with the accent I was starting to get so I actively changed my accent. It really comes out when I argue with people.

I live on sarcasm. I don't mean at least half of the things I say literately. I also try to take thing to the next level of odd to see if it can become funnier. This has gotten me in trouble occasionally, I don't mind that much as I consider them to be idiots if they can't take a joke.

My favorite humor is schadenfreude. I actively laugh at others misery, but I've always hated when it happens to me.

I love metaphors, but once again people don't get them. Maybe if it was a movie they could rewatch they could but they never try in real life.

All of my grandparents are dead. Two died when I was very young, the others more recently. I truly wish I could have known the ones who died when I was little, I hear many great stories about them and even more so, how my remaining grandparents changed after their spouses passed away. My friends, whom I did not have many, would tell me that they were glad that their grandparents were not in as bad shape as mine were. I couldn't be upset when they died. It was a relief for me and for the entire family waiting for the time to come.

I do not know what happens after death, but I do not believe it could be worse than anything we endure during life and I refuse to fear it.

I dislike my body.

As I said before, I'm about fifty pounds overweight. I hate looking at myself in the mirror. As long as I don't I forget what I really look like. In my mind I'm some type of perfect weight where my clothes fit perfectly and I don't have to be self conscience. I haven't been that thin since I was twelve.

I will be a clothes horse once I loose my weight. I love clothes. I wish men were allow and/or expected to dress up more often, hell, I already look great when I dress up. That said, I will really be happy when I can wear horizontal stripes, which is possibly a year away for me right now.


Twenty-two years and counting
-X


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